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Chris Christie Ain't No Trump.


Last night I tuned into CNN’s second Town Hall event, this time featuring Chris Christie, who is operating under some delusional fantasy that he has a chance of becoming the next President in 2024.

Christie, you may recall, was a staunch Trump ally throughout the entire 2016 campaign. He was awarded for his efforts by being named the head of the Trump transition team but was bumped off the team after getting into a pissing match with Jared Kushner (remember him?)

From that time onward, Christie remained a Trump supporter until the stench became a little too strong, particularly over the issue of election ‘fraud.’ When Christie began promoting his own Presidential bid, he referred to Trump as a ‘self-serving mirror hog,’ and promised that he would pull the GOP out of MAGA-land.

All fine and well, except that last night in front of an audience which appeared to be mostly college kids connected to GOP student groups at various New Jersey college campuses, Christie seemed to go out of his way both to sound like Trump in his comments about Joe Biden, as well as to run away from any issue on which he had ever said anything that made him sound out of step with the MAGA brand.

As to the former, Christie said right at the beginning of the event that he was running to prevent Biden from ‘destroying’ the United States. What the fu*k is Christie talking about? An unemployment rate under 4 percent? Or maybe he’s referring to some new Chinese virus which has started to spread.

As to the latter, Christie was asked what he would do to try and reduce gun violence, in particular given the fact that Christie had supported the assault-rifle ban which applied to all gun sales in New Jersey beginning in 1994.

Christie claimed that he was only 29 years old when the ban was passed, and he shouldn’t be blamed for his position on issues when he was too young and too immature to understand what was going on. Now that he was 60 years old, Christie said multiple times, he had a more mature view on all the issues that he would face after he ensconced himself in the Oval Office in 2025.

And how would this new-found maturity be reflected in his response to gun violence he was asked? Christie would convene a meeting with all the stakeholders on both sides of the gun violence issue and come up with solutions that would grow out of a ‘national conversation’ about the violence caused by guns.

Christie not only actually made this statement about a ‘national conversation’ multiple times, but somehow managed to make it while keeping a straight face.

How do these guys do that? How do they say something so goddamn stupid without then telling their listeners that anyone who would believe such nonsense would fail even the most basic IQ test?

Yea, yea, I know that Woke Nation doesn’t allow us to use the phrase ‘IQ test.’ Fine. Let’s just say that anyone who would buy into Christie’s call for a ‘national conversation’ about anything would have to be dumb as sh*t.

To his credit, the soon-to-be resident of one of the hotels run by the Federal Bureau of Prisons has never asked anyone to join any kind of ‘national conversation’ at all. What makes Trump Trump is his unshaken conviction that there’s only one conversation that counts, which is the conversation which he holds with himself.

And this is a conversation that is simply a recitation about what Trump likes to say about himself. So, for example, after he was indicted for only 37 federal felonies, he put a conversation on Truth Social that went like this: “In addition to closing the border & removing all of the ‘criminal’ elements that have illegally invaded our country, making America energy independent, & even dominant again, & immediately ending the war between Russia & Ukraine, I will appoint a real special ‘prosecutor’ to go after the most corrupt President in the history of the USA, Joe Biden, the entire Biden crime family, & all others involved with the destruction of our elections, borders and country itself!”

This is the kind of rhetoric, which is not only expected from Trump, but his supporters would be disappointed if he said anything else, particularly if he voiced even the slightest doubt about anything he says or believes. Because the truth is that for the average person who follows politics through a hookup to social media, Trump is far more entertaining than anything coming from Chris Christie or anyone else.

Which is why Trump will win the GOP nomination and Joe will be inaugurated again in 2025.


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