In about a week, I’m going to start a betting pool and invite everyone to guess whether Trump can win the 2024 Presidential election, assuming that he leads the GOP slate. And what I am prepared to do is pay anyone a Jackson who bets that Trump will win if in fact he does win. And if anyone bets that he will win and he runs and loses, then people who bet he would win will owe me a Jackson, but I’ll come up with some good charity where they can send their dough.
I’m probably going to ask my friends who bet that Trump will win to send their Jacksons to a charity which feeds the poor, or helps people in mental distress, you know, something good and compassionate like that. And I have no doubt that everyone who bets that Trump will be elected President again in 2024 will have to fork up some cash.
Because the truth is that Trump has about as much chance of winning a general election as I have to lose those final, goddamned 20 pounds that I haven’t been able to lose at any time in the last ten years.
Now if someone could make a potato chip which tastes like a potato chip but has zero calories, I would for sure have long ago lose that weight. But what makes potato chips taste so good is precisely the fact that a single chip has 10 calories, those little single-serving bags are around 150 calories, and let’s not talk about the ripple chips, okay?
All right (munch, munch) now back to Trump.
The orange shithead loves to tell everyone that no other incumbent President ever received 74 million votes in a second election. But what happens when you look at the state-by-state breakdown of the votes, all of a sudden, the increase in support for Trump in some of those red states was less than the increase for Biden in those same red states.
So, for example, in Montana, which is about as red a state as you’ll find anywhere, Trump pulled 64,362 more votes in 2020 than he pulled in 2016, but Joe’s 2020 total was 67,077 more than what Hillary pulled in 2016. In South Carolina, where Trump’s 2020 total was 229,714 votes higher than his 2016 number, Joe beat Hillary by 236,168 votes.
When Trump couldn’t find it in himself to denounce the Nazis who marched through Charlottesville, his approval rating sank to 36% and never recovered over the remainder of his term. Joe’s approval number has been around 40% for most of his term to date, but it has never been as low as 36%.
Now that DeSanctimonious has flopped and no other GOP Presidential noisemaker can get above 5%, until something happens which changes these numbers in some substantive way, the GOP primary contest is over even before it’s begun. And since neither Cornel West or Joe Kennedy can be taken seriously on the Democratic side, the choice open to Democrats for who will head the blue ticket in 2024 is also over and done.
So, what’s CNN or MS-NBC going to do to keep viewers from waiting to watch a game show or an online auction instead of staying interested in the news? They’ll continue to prop up Trump and pretend that when he goes on Truth Social and says that so-and-so is a no-good bastard or that he could settle the Ukraine war in ten minutes, that these mis-spelled proclamations deserve to be repeated and read.
They don’t deserve to be anything other than shit-canned and ignored. Which is why the current flap between Trump and Rupert Murdoch, if it continues, will only make it even more difficult for Trump to come anywhere near the top in 2024.
Although Trump is being indicted for all sorts of crimes, the truth is that he continues to commit the worst crime that any politician can ever commit. In the words of my late friend Jimmy Breslin, Trump has become a bore. And he’ll get more, not less boring as we move to 2024.
Which is why my friends who want to put a Jackson on Trump for next year will be sending their money to some charity that I recommend.