I hate to say it, but I really hope the shit with sprinkled glass party wins the election on November 8th.
I’m riffing on the great David Sedaris column about undecided voters in 2008 when he said, “I think of being on an airplane. The flight attendant comes down the aisle with her food cart and, eventually, parks it beside my seat. “Can I interest you in the chicken?” she asks. “Or would you prefer the platter of shit with bits of broken glass in it?”
That’s really how bad the GOP has become – shit with broken glass. As of September, there were GOP candidates running for some kind of public office in forty(!) states who were on record as still believing that the 2020 election was stolen from Trump.
On the other hand, in four key House swing districts, a poll published this morning in The New York Times had the percentage of election fraud believers down to thirty percent.
I’ve said it in previous columns, but I’ll say it again. I am hoping that the GOP will win back both the Senate and the House and following the election, Trump will announce that he’s in the race for 2024 and that his Vice President will be Marjorie Taylor Greene.
Now hold on a minute. Don’t get all pissed off. Just hear me out.
Going forward, here’s what we’ll have on the GOP side, no matter whether Joe runs again or not. We’ll have Trump telling everyone that he’s giving the voters an opportunity to take back what was stolen away from them two years ago. And we’ll have Marjorie Taylor Greene telling everyone that she’s a ‘Christian Nationalist’ which is what this country really needs.
Know what’s going to happen? The Fake News media is going to get sick of both of them real soon. And the head-to-head polls between Trump and Joe or whomever the Democrats run will be even worse for the GOP than they were the last time Trump ran.
In April 2020 when it was clear that Joe was going to be the Democratic nominee, the first Trump versus Biden polls had Joe up by 7 points. Over the next several months, no matter how often Trump said that Joe was senile, or that the Bidens were corrupt, the 7-point gap didn’t change.
Trump started talking about election ‘fraud’ in July, when many states, particularly blue states, began pushing early voting and voting by mail. Guess what? The polls still didn’t change – the needle didn’t move one bit.
By September, which is when George H. W Bush plastered Dukakis with his Willie Horton ad, Trump was still unable to shift voter opinion from where it had been all year long. And when the votes were all counted in November, the gap between blue and red was still seven points.
Not only will this be the scenario if Trump gets into the race, but if anything, pushing the election ‘fraud’ issue won’t help Trump at all. He simple fact is that a majority of voters in this country have never liked Trump, and they’re certainly not about to change that opinion with or without the presence on the GOP ticket of Marjorie Taylor Greene.
If I had a nickel for every time the Fake News runs a story on how divided the country has become, how our politics are now so ‘tribal’ and based on ideological extremes, I could go out and walk the back nine this afternoon instead of doing some real work. But the truth is that the real division isn’t between Democrats and Republicans, it’s within the GOP itself.
And the reason the Republican Party is splintering between its mainstream and MAGA wings, is simply because no other national political figure has yet to emerge within the GOP’s ranks.
The only person who takes Ted Cruz seriously as a Presidential aspirant is Ted Cruz. And Ron DeSantis might have blown his chances at being considered a valid national candidate with that incredibly stupid airlift trick.
So, who’s left on the GOP side if Trump gets indicted and can’t send out his daily ‘truths’ because he’s not allowed to access a computer while he’s in jail?
The Democrats already ran a woman for President. I forget her name, but she was our candidate (ugh, ugh) in 2016.
Isn’t it time that the Republican Party gives one of its women a chance to grab the brass ring? What about Marjorie Taylor Greene?